When you’re really drunk and I’m sober, you kind of annoy me. But when you’re really drunk, you talk dirty, which I like.
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What do you mean you weren’t wearing a condom?!?
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“Where’s your favorite place to be kissed?” I asked.
“My dick,” he said.
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Him: Sometimes I wish I was bi, because I feel like I’m missing out on so much.
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I put a “dick spell” on you.
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He said, “Your cock is beautiful, huge and thick. No wonder why your wife wants to fuck you all the time.”
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“Are you a top or a bottom?”
(Asked after the guy just topped him.)
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