“Did you just fart on my balls?”

“What if your parents walk in on us?”
“It’s ok. That’s why you’re on top.”

“So…this is my penis.”

“What are you thinking about?”
What?”
“Tell me what you’re thinking about.”
“I’m thinking I want you to shut up and fuck me.”
“I have to pee.”

“Your vagina is like Pet Sematery,” he said.

“Have you done porn?”
“No.”
“You give head like a porn star.”

“We should have sex more often. Why don’t we have sex more often?”